Welcome to JiggeryPoetry!
JiggeryPoetry is the whole poetry package. Whether you need a comedy poem for a wedding, a speech for a retirement or birthday, a touching tribute for a loved one or a workshop for your school, you are in the right place.
So please enjoy exploring the site where you will find lots of examples of the type of things I love to create.
My first book of daft poems for all the family is available here
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My book of Christmas poems - ‘Bagsy That (...and other Christmas poems)’ is available here.
My book of comedy poems for dads - 'Bin Day' - is available is through a quick message: email@example.com
My latest book, 'A Midsummer's Ice Cream and Other Poems' is available now through Amazon.
For Kim & Chris 2019
For Kim & Chris
The outlook for the day is golden sunshine wall to wall.
No greying clouds are in the sky; no rain’s about to fall.
So while the forecast’s favorable and champagne glasses brim,
Come take a trip with me into the world of Chris and Kim.
It may sound quite the cliche, a poetic heart to heart,
But the problem, put quite simply, is exactly where to start!
A poem of serenity or verse that’s loud and jokey?
Less Chris’ quest for quietude; more Kim on karaoke.
It all began quite awkwardly as friendship turned to romance;
Chris’ friends could be forgiven for thinking he had no chance,
But soon enough, with ring in hand and undeterred expression
He moved towards the living room to hit Kim with the question.
So picture if you will the sunlight streaming through the window,
Our man with sweating palms rehearsing matrimony lingo.
The sparkler poised in fingers; the bended knee manouevre -
But Kim is more preoccupied with brand new Argos Hoover.
If you know Kim, you’ll be aware she likes a bit of cleaning;
A wizard with the Windolene, if no-one’s intervening.
But save a thought for Chris, whose body waited, stalled and trembled
As he stared upon his love’s attempts to get that thing assembled.
So lost inside that vacuum for an hour, maybe more
He contemplated life and thought of what there was in store:
A girl as strong as anyone with eyes and smile bewitching
Who’s a dab hand with a duster and knows how to shine a kitchen.
A scintillating firework with fireworks within
Mainly down to too much Rumtopf, aperol and gin.
And every day for years Kim’s face had occupied his head,
As only she knew how to disengage him from his shed.
Eventually Kim noticed him and quickly turned around,
Refusing though to throw the thing’s instructions to the ground.
And even though she realised how long he’d had to linger,
She held his gaze and grabbed the ring and stuck it on her finger.
So from that day to this, the time has rapidly unfurled:
Chris has spent it locked in shed and Kim at Slimming World,
And now before the lights dim and the music starts to play,
There’s one more stanza from my heart that I would like to say.
It’s easy to be trivial about your quirks and quaintness;
But much more fun to recognise your loveliness and greatness.
For on this day of days when friends and relatives are here
When both your smiles and tenderness ignite the atmosphere.
When magic, dreams and starlight surround us in excess,
We’re proud to call you friends, and wish you every happiness.
Published 25th Sep 2019 | Weddings
Allow me to help if you need a JiggeryPoem for...
- The Father of the Bride
- The Groom, Bride or Best Man
- A Tribute to a special friend or relative
- A Birthday or Anniversary
- Mothers' Day, Fathers' Day, Christmas
- A Corporate Promotional event
Re: 'Starting Over'One of my childhood bezzies, who knew my Dad as well as anyone when we were kids, writes some brilliant poetry so I asked him if he could put something together with him in mind. Knowing my Dad was both a John Lennon fan and a great cook he came up with this. It blew me away. Thank you so much Stephen Williams
From Ian, Wigan
Below ParI needed something just a little out of the ordinary as a special memory and testament to a friend. Steve at Jiggery Poetry quickly got to work and created a bespoke piece which offered a humorous yet respectful and fitting piece of poetry which hit the spot. I can't recommend him enough....
From Roz, Yorkshire
School LibrarianThanks Steve for a brilliant poetry slam day at our school. The kids were entertained from start to finish with your energy and ability to get them writing and performing their work! The poems you wrote for us are very funny - the 'librarian' one has pride of place in our office!!
From Jean - School Librarian, Selby